Novel Conditions
by deadliving
Summary: A Plague sweeps through the world, with an almost 100% killrate. The survivors have to contend with rising water, Escaped monsters, famine,and worsely; Themselves
1. Mark's Clan

_This is how the world ends,_

_not with a bang, but a whimper_

_-T.S. Eliott_

It was like a dream. Or rather, nightmare. An RNA virus, Flagg's Fever came upon us as a simple shower:

_NASAIS File #27137711_

_Unpredicted meteor shower over the North Atlantic Europe and America. Dubris may also end up as far away as Senegal or Trinidad._

It wasn't uncommon for an unpredicted meteor shower. NASA Investigative Sevice was always legally obligated to conduct a scan of the sky. NASA Investigative Service was frankly, a team of volunteers that scanned the skies for any activity. They saved us innumerable times from large asteroids, but often times, they were called to investigate simple dust that fell from the heavens.

_NASAIS File #27137711 cont._

_No Alien contaminents. A Novel RNA Virus found. Nicknamed '#612177RF'. Deemed to be a Novel Non-Lethal RNA virus._

Now, that would be a shortcoming one could laugh at, if it were funny.

Flagg's Fever was similar to AIDS and Influenza, as it is a RNA virus. RNA viruses have the disturbing potential to evolve into new strains withindays. Overall, Flagg's fever's symptoms include high fever, necrosis, swelling, sweating, and vomiting. It had the evolutionary potential of Influenza, the lethality of AIDs, and the virulence of bubonic plague.

It was the Disease to end all diseases.

_

* * *

_

At the side of the pool, amongst the corpses of tanners and swimmers, Mark Lilly squats. He glared into the shimmering water. Between the corpses of children, he could see his reflection, eyes focused back on Mark. His brown bangs were combed over to the left of his head. His red polo shirt was stained with sweat and dust. It had been quite a few days since he left New York City.

Despite the piling bodies in this Pennsylvanian motel, New York City was overflowing with about 7-8 million dead humans. A Good 10,000 committed suicide, or were killed by rogue survivors. Flagg's Fever had a 100% kill rate, but some people reacted differently than others. As it turns out, some that survived the initial infection became insane, almost vampiristic. The disease was abusing the survivors to spread itself. Approximately 10% of all infected would react this way.

"Mark!" a voice hollered from behind Mark. Mark peeked over his shoulder. An elderly chinese man, Luoang Lao Shi, loads a gallon of water into the back of a pick up truck.

"We are leaving, pack up your things, we are heading out in a moment." he added. His grandson, Jake Long, leaped into the back of the pickup truck, with a bag of canned soup. The Two were leading a caravan into Rural Penn. Behind Mark and the Longs, there was a lobster-alien, Zoidberg, Some Rats, a highscooler Bill Hitchcock, and an Arthritic man, Richard Krupse.

As the Red Ford Pick-up exited the motel parking lot, so too followed a golf cart, a '58 Plymouth Fury, and Camouflage Jeep Cherokee.

* * *

Mark lifts his suitcase up over his head, standing in Battery Park on top of a crashed bus. Beside him, strung between a lamppost, a banner, which read; SOS! A survivor on Manhattan! He scanned the horizon, but saw absolutely nothing. No birds flying by, no ships in the harbor, not a single sound, save the lapping of waves and buzzing of flies. Mark fell back on his rump, and sighed. Even with the can-do attitude he normally possessed, thoughts of suicide rubbed his temples gently.

'Click clack, squeak squeak' came echoing down the cavernous streets. Mark leaps to his feet, flourishing his arms above his head.

"Hey, I'm here in Battery Park!" Mark shouted.

From behind the burnt skeleton of a skyscraper, an elderly Chinese man, cloaked in blue robes with golden cuffs, and an adolescent Chinese boy in a red jacket with gelled hair appeared. Mark threw himself forward. He landed upon a car hood, and leaped upon charred or decaying corpses. At any other time in his life, he would have cringed at the thought of even touching a dead body. He was too ecstatic to care that the bodies he was hoppig across were the people he knew and loved. He found more survivors.

"Hey, Hey!" Mark shouted. The teenager's face instantly transformed into a surprised one. He took a step back from the stranger, while the old man remained still. He glared at Mark with a stone-cold gaze. Before Mark came any closer, The old man held out a hand.

"Come no closer. Put your hands where I can see them." He commanded. Mark stood confused. Before his eyes, the elder transformed into a blue Chinese dragon. His companion followed suit, morphing into a red dragon. "Are you a friend or foe?" the Blue Dragon asks, assuming an offensive position.

Mark dropped on his knees. "I am a friend. I don't mean harm." The Dragon lowered his arms.

"Where are you heading?" The Blue dragon asked.

Mark got to his feet. "I was planning on staying here until the plague subsides." The Dragon shakes his head disapprovingly.

"That is a most foolish decision. Nobody can survive Flagg's Fever, that I am sure of." he explains in a gravelly voice.

Mark begins to lean back and forth. "Where are you going if the Fever is a Hundred percent lethal?"

The Old Dragon tousles his beard with a claw. "West. If we find a place with no dead, We'll stay there. Besides that we have nothing to do. We'll have to die someday. I'd rather it be somewhere away from all the others."

Mark inches closer. "May I join you. I truly just want to get away from this place."

The younger dragon glares at Mark. "How are you going to help us? You're just another survivor like us. There are already too many mouths to feed." He explodes, finally speaking. The Older Dragon puts an arm out infront of him.

"Hold your tongue, Jake. Be thankful we have another companion in this world." The Elderly dragon barks.

"Mark, as you are coming with us to safer lands, We should introduce ourselves." He puts a hand on the other dragon's shoulder. "This is my grandson, Jake. I am Lauong Lao Shi."

Mark smiles, glad to see another human again.

* * *

Zoidberg pulls some rats from the garbage. "Survivors!" shouts the Decapodian. He grabs them with his claws into a great bear hug. The tentacles above his mouth shudder.

The Rats squealed at him, "Let us go, or we will give you bubonic plague."

The alien kept his grip on the rodents. "I love you guys." A deerslug ricocheted off a trashcan next to them. Zoidbergs turns to see an middle-aged man, with short black hair gelled up into spikes. He wore a black tank top with a leather jacket over top and long black suit pants. He had a shotgun aimed right for the crustacean's head.

"Don't make this seem even more desperate by running." The man ordered. He had a thick German accent. Zoidberg and the rats uttered a squeal of fright. The Man edged closer, aiming the gun lower upon the Decapodian. With each move forward, Zoidberg moved back. The Man pumped the gun, when a claw from nowhere slices the barrel in half horizontally.

The Man jerks his head to the side, where Jake stood with his dragon claws unsheathed. "I wouldn't shoot if I were you." he threatens.

"Dis land is my land now. There are no laws to say it isn't." The man barks. Jake smiles.

"D'you wanna know what makes it no-man's-land?" Jake says smiling. He snatches the gun, and tosses it. It hits a man's body, which ripples with maggots.

"Look, I'm hungry. I am noot going to eat another human." He pleads.

"Eat pigeons. They're always better." Zoidberg adds.

"Well, my Grandfather and I are heading West, maybe to the Plains, or Canada. We already have another traveler, and there's protection in numbers." Jake offers. The Man glances at Zoidberg and the Rats.

"Alright." The Man agrees. He smiles, and laughs "My nom is Richard Krupse."

"I'm Zoidberg." Zoidberg chirps.

"We no really have names, but we want to join!" The Rats chime in. Jake begins walking away. The Five quickly puzzle over the Teenager's action. He turns to face them, and mutters, "Follow..."

* * *

All on the sides of the road, crashed cars, pulverised bodies, and all over the roadway, black vomit stains. The Rat's noses twitched eagerly at the reak of death. Mark stuck up his nose in disgust. People were allowed to die in these numbers, and remain there. Zoidberg followed each body with his beady little lobster eyes, locking onto one target, and then another, as they went. Billy glared at every body with worried eyes. Richard sat back in his seat, trying his best to ignore the overwhelming rot surrounding him. Jake glared at the corpses with a vigilant nervousness, as if they were going to strike him.

The Landscape was monotonous after a few miles; fence, dead cows, a farmer sprawled out on the road, fence, silo, barnyard, and repeat. A violet blanketed the world in inky darkness, with only a small star shedding light onto the world. Mark leaned back against the back cabin wall of the truck. Jake was asleep on a sack of flour. The Rats seemed unfazed, whilst the Decapodian clacked his claws in his sleep. Richard kept his eyes glued to the road. His old eyes were set back deep in his head, surrounded by deep purple bags. Mark could recognize them from somewhere, although Richard and him never spoke a word to Mark. He was only staring at the long road ahead. Single-mindedly driving.

Getting away from Hell.


	2. The Winking Morningstar

_Wrong Ideas are always right_

_-_Howard Bloom, _The Lucifer Principle_

Prisons were one of the few places on Earth where many people survived. Security officers, and inmates closest to the exit died, but the rest remained. The Nevada Correctional Facility was one such place.

A Purple Lamb kneels at the barred door. A mouse lay dead, sprawled out on the floor just out of reach. As much as she stretched and strained, she could not lay a finger on it.

"Why try Lammy?" the inmate in the cell across from her scoffed. "We're all going to die." He stood at the bars, glaring down the hallway. He had peircings in his ears nose, and eyelids, green and black hair, and hollow, uncaring eyes.

"Shut your pessismistic pie hole, Duncan." Lammy pokes her head out of her cell. "Griffin, what'dya think about this situation?" A cockroach scuttled near the seemingly empty cell, antennae twitching. Suddenly, it is impaled in the back by the sharpened end of a floating toothbrush. It is quickly shoved into an invisible mouth. Griffin's lips and palm were outlined by the bug's visceral organs.

"Everybody start digging. Whom ever escapes first has the right as a human to eat the rest." Griffin jokes, in his posh manner. In the last cell at the end of the Hallway, sat a man, scarred, with long upward black hair sat, arms sticking from the cell. His name was Jackknife. In the cell next to his, Herbert commited suicide. None of the pests came close to him, and his leg was sticking out of the bars.

He reached for the leg, which was just out of reach. Duncan, Lammy, and Griffin all come the the door of their cell to see Jackknife's desperate act. It was an unspoken fact that everyone was going to resort to cannibalism. The first to do so wouldn't be considered a desperate man, but a clever one.

Pale pink light filtered into the caged windows from the dawning Desert sun. Duncan glared at the last lights until morning. He was too hungry to sleep, and he was afraid someone might actually kill and eat him. The Plague of Flagg's Disease started around Four weeks ago. Food stopped coming after the guards died, about 25 days ago. Water stopped two and a half days ago when the pumps at Lake Mead stopped pumping. They were all desperate for food, water, and freedom. _If Wikipedia was right_, Duncan thought, _I only have half a day to live_.

Half a Day almost went by.

Lammy's stomach woke her up when she saw a peculiar sight. She sits up on her bed, staring into the sky. Venus was winking at her. She gasped, and rolled onto the floor. She tossed the skeleton of a dead shrew at Duncan, entreating him to wake. After two attempts to wake up her other inmates, Lammy instead decided to pray.

_I know I haven't been the best daughter,_

_But O'lord, save us_

_Before we all die._

I don't know if God heard the lamb that moment, and nor did Lammy. The sheep turned suddenly when a rat entered her cell. Grabbing it, she quickly bit the creature's head off, and began tearing strips of flesh off the stomach.

Apparating in a puff of flames, there in the hallway appeared a sharply dressed young man. His Blonde hair was combed back to a point. His facial expression was stern, but sadistically playful, with the ends of his lips up in a slight curve. His pale white skin was like that of a snake's, and Lammy swore she could see fangs. He was in an all black buisiness suit, with a red carnation and tie.

He folds his arms, and scans the hallway. He turns and glares at Lammy, who dropped the animal she had just slaughtered. "I see cannibalism is the new post-apocalyptic trend." He smirks. Lammy begins shivering. The room had grown cold, and she could see her breath floating from her mouth. "Now, we can't have good inmates sleeping..." he jokes. With a flick of the wrist and the snap of a finger all the windows shattered.

Duncan, Jack Knife, and Griffin all leaped from under their covers. To their surprise, they find a dark figure in the hallway in front of them.

"Who the Hell are you!" Jackknife shouts in his usual jibber-jabber. The Suited One wags a finger at Jack Knife, whose mouth shuts against his will.

"Don't Disrespect me!" TheSuited One Hollers.

"What are you doing here?" Griffin asks.

"I am here to save you." The Harvester smiles sinfully.

"How do we know you aren't going to kill us?" Duncan retorts.

With the flick of his wrist, all the doors fly open.

"Yu'd have been killed already."


	3. Walking Man

_Hit the Road, Jack_

_And don't you come back,_

_No more, No more, No more_

_- _Ray Charles

Anthony DiNozzo strutted down the Maryland roadway. All around him, cars in a forever standstill traffic, dessicated corpses hung from the windows. Flies droned around his sweaty head. In Armani loafers, he trudged though a mix of blood, oil, and rain water, amongst other debris. Strung around his waist, two guns, Desert Eagles. Jangling around his neck on a nickel chain, a dog tag, with the engraved names of his teammates.

Once, he was a Navy Criminal Investigative Service Second-in-Command Field Agent, solving Naval crimes, with his friends and coworkers; Leroy Jethro Gibbs, Senior officer, and Mentor; Ziva David, Mossad Liason and an almost lover; Timothy McGee, 'Probie', Tech wiz, and a bit of a pushover; Donald Mallard, Ducky, Medical examiner, and Wisest man alive; Abigail Scuito, Abby, preppy goth forensic scientist.

As soon as The Mediterranean Super pandemic occurred, The team began to break. Ziva was grieving over the death of friends in Israel, Tim was paranoid, fearing Flagg's Fever would leap the Pond (Which it did), and everyone was on edge, as the Al Qaeda sect in DC would be fuming over the fall of the Arab World. As soon as it did cross the Atlantic, Tim and Abby were first to get Flagg's Fever. Tony watched in distraught as his friends fell to Flagg's Fever. Gibbs left DC before he was infected, and nobody saw him after then.

Looking back at Washington, he could see the Washington monument, clear as day. There was little to no smog, and many buildings had crumbled already. Turning back to the road, the highway began changing. As the traffic began to ease up, ailanthus, kudzu, dandelions, clovers, and moss emerged from every minuscule crevasse in the worn down asphalt. Around him, amongst smoldering ashes, more corpses, layed about in all manner of positions. Although his life is forever changed by the Flagg, one aspect of his old life crossed over; _I wouldn't be surprised if I found a couple going down in doggie style_, He thought to himself.

* * *

Greg Sanders struts out of the dark shadows outside a cave. His black hair was uncombed, as it was ever since the beginning of Flagg's Fever Pandemic. He wore a sheriff uniform. A smoking 9 mil sat in the holster. He stuck a toothpick between his teeth. Walking out into the Nevadan sun, his pale skin glistened. Blood slowly oozed out from under his 10 gallon hat, and rolled down his temple onto the parched soil. "Yeah know, Sir. I always wanted to be the guy in charge. Tak." He chuckles.

In front of him, The Suited One stood in front of him. He sighs, grinning. "Ah, you know I'm the one in charge here, right Mr. Sanders? And you'd better behave, Tak."

Sander's eyes turn deep red, his skin bursts open, revealing the flesh underneath. Greg opened his mouth, but a demon was voicing his words. It was deep heavy and gravelly."Aw, Sir Draco, I ain't gonna ruin Misser Sanders like I did that Old man. Tak."

Sander's face reverts to his normal olive complexion. "There ain't nothing you need to worry about." Tak cuts in over Sanders. "We can take care of all of it. Tak."

The Suited One smiles, and nods. He turns and walks over to his convicts. Griffin had been deliberately painted bright orange, to see his invisible body. Duncan, Jackknife, and Lammy all eyed the Suited One, aniously waiting to hear his next commands. Griffin, as his eyes were not painted, didn't seem to be watching. "Now, my convicts, I have freed you for one reason only." He proclaims. "To build anew." He twirls his finger, and the inmates are spun around. They all look out over the cliff face into the City of Las Vegas. He grins. "Now, what do you see?".

Duncan puts a hand over his chin. "Could it be Sin City?" he smirks. He suddenly receives a jolt to his spine. Searing pain, somewhat of an electrical burn. He falls forward onto his hands and knees, bawling in pain. Draco comes up behind, and kicks him in the side. "Of course that's Sin City!" He shouts at Duncan.

The Apparater begins inhaling deep breaths. "Well, I want to start anew, with a world in my full control, with Vegas as it's capitol."

"Sir," Griffin peeps. "Why Las Vegas?"

" 'Cause all 'em Buzzards ate the corpses! Tak!" Tak barks hysterically. Draco grunts, and spinning on his heel, delivers a pale knuckle to Sander's face. Greg is thrown back by the force, and blood begins trickling down from his right nostril. He sits up, and pats his upper lip, a tear dripping down his sweaty face. Lammy could hear Greg mutter under his breath, 'Jesus Christ.'.

The Apparator turns back to face his convicts. "Now, your job in my new society is to be the repair men of Las Vegas. Greg and Tak there will be the Authority. None of you buggers are gonna do anything wrong, Got it?" The convicts nodded. Greg pulled out a pistol, and whistled. A coyote leapt out of nowhere, and snarled. Tak growled right back at it. "Make'em march to the Strip." He commands. The Coyote curtsies, and growls at the convicts, who begin trudging down the hill.

Tak follows Draco with his eyes, until he leaps off the cliff and apparates to some unknown land. He spits out the toothpick. "He's some great warlock, and I'm stuck in some Norwegian's body. Ass. Tak." He follows the coyote down the slope, stirring up dust with his heavy boots.


	4. Welcome the New!

_Da ist keine hoffnung, und keiner Zuversicht_

_denn Feuer und Wasser komm nicht zusammen_

-Till Lendemann

_All illnesses of Christians are to be ascribed to demons_

_-_St. Augustine

_Fear makes the wolf much bigger than it really is_

_- _A German Proverb

Simon stares at the open road north to Euproarch. Pines bordered the lonely concrete road North. Grimmsville was a small city of close to 1100 people. 1127, if Simon was correct. 13 people survived the initial epidemic, but of them, four commited suicide, five went North to New York City, and are never to be seen again. The other survivor, Kenny, was dead to begin with. Despite this, Kenny built all the signs that sprouted from the roof tops. White banners with glow-in-the-dark orange paint broadcasted the Grimmsen's message to anyone walking within 15 miles of the microstate.

The other three survivors, Simon Dianne, Mary Rinehart, and 'Cubo' Hassan were as good off as Kenny. Simon was a well built teen, with gelled up auburn hair, side burns curling down to his chin, and small beady eyes, and an inward hate strong enough to manifest itself outside his body. Mary was a schitzophrenic with dirty blonde hair, combed over to cover her right eye. She wore a red heart necklace, and green and blue pants. Cubo was a 6 year old 'little person' with very little hair save three longs strands growing out above his forehead.

Simon looks back over his shoulder upon Mary and Cubo. Mary had been tied to a pine tree and was babbling on about sex, while Cubo held on tightly to his Koran. Simon knew he was Muslim, but he also knew his family wasn't very conservative in any matter. Simon couldn't blame him. As the plague swept over the town, everyone that had a religion died praying, save Cubo, Claire, and Tod.

Claire and Tod were part of the group that left Grimmsville for New York. They had likely died already.

In one part of Simon's mind, only the strong survive, and only the careful prosper. Simon, nor Cubo or Mary were very strong or careful, which bewildered the strict unblinking part of Simon's mind. Even with all the might of a drug addict working on an SAT, Simon could scarcely grasp the gravity of his situation. I mean, one day, you're living a normal suburban life, the next, you are with a six year old 'Little Person', and a Schitzophrenic, surrounded by corpses.

Simon stood, face embracing the hot wind coming off the Delaware River. Ever since the epidemic, it seems to him there is a stark change in the height of water level each day. Waters of the Delaware were creeping in and over Dodd street, and only the buildings straddling Benjamin Franklin Hills remained high and dry.

A crashing roar erupted in the Trio's ears. They glance down Main street, and the Billboards, General stores, and Abandoned warehouses full of pesticides, all topple into the brown brackish water.

"Douches are very sanitary, Thank you." Mary hollers at no one in particular. Cubo glares daggers at her, then turns back to the ruins of Main Street. "Robots and Trees come zu dir! Vergnügen Mich!" She babbles, spitting saliva upon her chin and chest.

Mary was interesting in the fact that her unconscous, frank speech fluctuated between German and English. Simon tooked at Mary's eyes, which were focused at the Pines that surrounded the road to Euproarch. Three figures emerged from the wood. Two were obviously mechanical, whilst the other was similar in shape and color to the trees he had emerged from.

Cubo was anxious, and Simon observed at the travelers with an Eagle eye. Mary could care less.

"I wanna fuck your little Brother." she murmured. "Can't we trust Roboter with our lives?" The sane part of her utters.

Cubo smiles, looking at his shoes. "Maybe. Maybe we can trust them."

Simon's eagle eyes met Cubo's. "Maybe we can't."

Mary coughs in her five cents. "Vibrators are robots too!"

* * *

Las Vegas grew to a good size relatively quickly. The Suited One collected the sparsely populated souls of Earth.

Duncan glances around, observing the street around him. Greg Sanders was hanging a sign that read; No Trespassing property of the Harvester. To Duncan's right, Lammy and Griffin were washing the windows of a storefront window. Jack Knife was pushing a road-paving machine down the long sandy trail. It's bulky yellow sides were stained by asphalt, and when it's pipes churned, black tar shot from the smokestack.

Jack Knife lacked his prison tattoos, as they were a sign of his identity as a prisoner, and signalled loyalty with extinct comrades. Where ink had touched, Tak had a packrat peel off the skin. Jack Knife's Elvis-like hair had been shaved off to find more contriband.

Everyone else throught it was to elicit pain from the weakest individual in Vegas.

Duncan returned to his job fixing street lamps. He jammed the screwdriver into the lamp post, taking out some screws, without any real consideration of what he is actually doing. There would be new workers to help sometime soon. New guys can clean up his mistakes.

...

Greg glares at the highway ahead with unbattering eyes. In a flash of light, Draco arrived, with another group of survivors. There was a Blue otter, with pirate attire, an eyepatch, peg legs, and hook. There was a man with an olive complexion, long black hair, small beady eyes, blue canvas shirt, and tan khaki pants. The Last person was a large turtle of sorts, with flaming red hair, orange skin, and a black dog collar.  
Draco was pushing them along, hands outstretched behind them. He had been talking to them during their trip, and the monologue continued as they walked the narrow ivory black pathway to Vegas.

"And if you'll just follow mah rules, no one can harm you." Draco assures in a false Texan accent. Draco hands the blue otter a stone, which transforms into a gleaming silver wrench. The three gasp. Greg pough-poughs the magic trick. _Wizards can't do real shit_, Tak whispers to him. Draco hands it to the otter. "Now, Russell, you can go into Lake Mead and start a job fixin' up all 'em pipes. No good pipes makes all o' us die." He sucks his teeth, and nods over to glances at Greg. "That Man o'er there is Sheriff Greg Sanders. He's you're leader till I return. Ya' hear?"

The Three nod. "Yes, Sir." They reply

"Well, then, I'm off to save more of the innocent." He says, putting on a croc's smile. With that, he apparates into thin air.

Greg smiles happily. "Now," he cocks his AK-47, "The fun of Hard Labor begins."


	5. Tiang's Message in a Bottle

"Whenever you have truth it must be given with love, or the message and themessenger will be rejected"

-Mahatma Gandhi

"Fear - Until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore, you will not know the terror of being forever lost at sea."

Larry Kersten

Tiang sits at the desk, once his owner's, scratching at a peice of cotton paper with a quill. Had his owner lived longer, he would have taken him very far away. Possibly even to the main land, Ecuador. But seeing as Tiang is still a relatively young orangutan (Not yet a full adult, but certainly not a child), Tiang felt much more content staying on the little island he had been born and raised. Now, though, as his words flowed onto the paper, water was rising, swallowing his island.

Tiang drops the pen, scooping up the paper, examining his pen-work;

**To whom ever finds this letar **

**My name is of no importanse, **

**all that is important is the informashon.**

**The World water levels are rising.**

**Do NOT atempt to drink, fish or swim.**

**I have informashon that the water is poisonous.**

**There is Arsenic, Cadnium, Gold, and Cyanide**

** in the water, almost all the fish are all dead.**

**There are also diseases. Flaggs Fever, Cholera, Shiggera, Escheria Coli.**

**If you recieve this do not look for me.**

**I likely died.**

**May God be wit you.**

Tiang smiles, and shoves it in a chloroform bottle, one that would have once invoked fear in Tiang. He open the dor, knuckle walking out onto the patio. The Poisonous hummed around him. A dirty ocean lapped along the road downhill the bungalow. A dinghy sat beside him on the patio. He tossed the bottle to the blue water. He then dragged the oar to the shore, leapt in and paddled off to Ecuador, the trip he should have taken weeks ago.


	6. Battle of Gettysburg

It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell

-Siddharta Guatama

You can't always sit in your corner of the forest and wait for people to come to you,...you have to go to them sometimes.

-Winnie the Pooh

There is no turning back, you've woken up the Demon in me...Oh no the World is a Scary Place now that you've woken up the demon in me.

-The Disturbed

Billy Hitchcock recognized this town as he approached on foot. Almost stumbling to the side from exhaustion, he shouts to no one in particular, "It's Gettysburg, Ma!". Jake glares at the delusional teen. He looks around; a Confederate flag with a lynched black boy hung from a tree, cars were stacked like dominoes on the highway, smoke bellowed an unknown number of miles away. and crows cawed around them.

"Grandpa, is Gettysburg around here?" he yells back to his elderly grandfather.

"It is around 3 miles away as the crow flies." he replies respectfully.

Mark smiles, putting his hands on his hips, glaring down the road in amazement. 'Well look at that, We've made it to South Penn before September. We'll reach East Kentucky before it even begins snowing."

"Don't be too hopeful." Zoidberg chimes in, frankly pessimistic.

Mark, shoots a scowl at him, then sets his eyes back on the Longs. They looked like they had walked through thorn bushes. The Grandpa's blue robes were tattered, torn, and silver markings on his cuffs had lost their sheen. The Boy's red jacket had gaping holes in several places; One on the back of his collar, one under his right armpit, and numerous up and down his stomach.

Everybody was in a similar condition to the Longs. The Three Mice were mere fur and bones, barely waking up every morning. Zoidberg's exoskeleton is battered with scratches from the thick forests in North Pennsylvania. His doctor's uniform was hanging onto his shoulders by wiry tethers. Billy's jeans had holes on his knees, and the soles of his sneakers were worn out. Richard Krupse had used his shirt to rekindle a fire, and his long denim pants were suffering with deep wounds, that had even cut the old man.

Mark himself was wearing out his clothes quicker than the changing climate. But, Mark was hopeful that this trip into Gettysburg would replenish the group's spirits.

* * *

Draco apparates into Central PA, north of Gettysburg. Around him was an amazing vista of the Piedmont. Fires raged in the distance, and the smoke cast an incredible shadow onto the forest. He inhales a breath of air, and exhales a fog of venom. In a puff of smoke, he darts down the hills. Even rushing at a good 10 miles (Draco has always been a fast rambunctious little boy), he could hear their chatter. He was now their savior, from an unforgiving world of the same God that had allowed, or even sent Flagg's to Earth.

Through the thicket of trees, he could see the group. A tall white man, a Chinese boy, An Elderly Chinese man, A white teenager, some alien that reminded him a hell of a lot like a lobster, three mice, and a older man with no shirt. When it came to adherents, as with food, beggers can't be choosers. They all seemed horribly tired and hungry, and it seemed easy to entice them to become citizens of his civilization.

* * *

Jake looked over at a noise in the woods. He couldn't tell what it was, but he almost thought it was someone or something walking upon sticks and dry leaves. He looks into the haze of the black forest undergrowth. through the fog, he can see a sillohuette coming towards them. Jake inches forwards. His Blonde Hair was slicked back to a point. His clown-smile had a row of snake like fangs. His white skin almost glowed, even in the shade of the forest, in contrast to his strict black uniform.

The Hand he had held behind his back came forward and revealed a steaming stack of pancakes with a dollop of butter and streams of syrup. His pale lips open. "Would you like these?"

Jake's eyes check over his shoulder, to see if anyone was watching this. A lump welled up, from his gut to his throat. Jake hadn't been properly fed since atleast Reading, if not Middlesex. They would stop at a gas station if there were few bodies and what ever hadn't spoiled was theirs, if they could carry it along with them. A diet of sunflower seeds and beans without a lot of water was straining on his kidneys.

The Man pulled his hands away, and the pancakes disappeared into the fog. Jake wasn't as unaccustomed as the Man expected. Jake knew a few wizards in NYC, but for the most part, they were dicks.

In a soothing, motherly voice, he politely says " I know a land west of here where we still have America. We have all the food you can eat. Beds to rest your aching bodies."

Jake's mouth opened, but no words came out, subdued by hunger. He leans forward, and his left leg follows suit, hitting the ground with a skid. A Hand grabs him from behind, and Jake looks over his shoulder to see his Grandfather, assumed his dragon form. Jake and His Grandfather were both dragons, although the two weren't really helpful during the panic after Flagg's came to Portland. From there, it came sweeping through New England. It got as far West as Jerusalem's Lot, and as far south as Dunwich. There, the military began rampant extermination programms.

After the Moosylvanian Civil War spilled over both borders, the Military had it's attention on the violence in Minnesota, and the New England campaign faultered. New York went to sleep knowing the Zone of infection was halted in Dunwich, and woke up with eight million dead bodies.

Grandpa glares at the man with beady eyes. Draco's eyes narrowed, with pure blackened evil staring into the dragon's eyes.

"Be gone, Dark Wizard." He spoke softly. Back in New York, He would've been on that bastard's ass as soon as he realized he was a villan. But that was back when you didn't fear a coyote coming to consume you in the middle of the night.

Mark, Richard, and Zoidberg stand still, determining when to attack the Man in Black. Billy stood in half-slouched pose, looking like he had witnessed the devil on Earth. Draco's lips curl into a smile. "Why don't you all join The America Colony. We have enough room for you, and food's aplenty!".

Noone had seen Billy's first strike. It was like the boy had run down a hillside, flapping his arms around, until he leapt in the air and delivered a punch to the wizard's face. Billy flew to the ground, face first into a pokeweed patch. The Wizard's face was one of an Enraged monster, and he pulled his wand out, pointed it at Billy. He purses his lips and shouts, "Avada Kedavr-"

Mark and Richard tackle him. Mark knew a bit about football, he had his fun beating up the kids down at Lebanon. But there was a powerful wizard between his arms, ready to kill all of them, not a drunk buddy. Richard on the other hand, was socking him in the gut like a punching bag. One might reason he was a cop. All cops he knew worked out a hell of a lot. Draco, straining to take in a breath through the constant blows, elbows Mark in the face. Mark lets go of the wizard's abdomen, and Draco jabs his thumb into Richard's throat.

Billy came rushing back, and began kicking the Briton in the side. Grandpa comes swooping in claws unsheated, tearing open the back of the suit, with red gurgling from the holes. Draco flicks his wand around, and Billy, Mark, Zoidberg, and Jake go flying backwards. Richard had just gotten to his feet, and was hurdling with all his might towards the pale skinned man. Draco barks, "Cruciartus!" and a green light comes flying towards the Elder. He crumples onto the ground, an excruciating pain wrippling through his body like worms writhing over a body.

The Blue chinese dragon comes swooping down, claws beared once more. Draco was waiting, and he grabs the dragon's legs. He pulls them forward, sending Grandpa into the ground. The Dragon weaves around himself coming back at the enrage wizard. Draco shouts "Stupefy!" with Wand aimed directly at the dragon's forehead. Lao Shi, now stunned, continues forward, where his scaly neck is greeted by the broad skeletal hands of the warlock.

Spider veins writhe in Draco's temples as he smashes Lao Shi's neck into the ground. The Blue Dragon begins gasping for air. Jake now transforms, rocketing into action. A breath of Flames comes down upon the Briton. He leaps back, and grunts in defeat. "WE WILL FIND YOU! AND I SHALL HAVE NO MERCY UPON YOU ALL!" He explodes, apparating into thin air.

Jake kneel next to his still Grandfather. Mark and Zoidberg watch in astonishment. He had killed a dragon. _with his bare hands!_ I mean you can kill animals that way, you can kill people that way, but a _dragon_! This Man -Monster, even- was formidable. Now they had starving mice, a dead body, a writhing man circling the drain.

Jake was weeping at the side of his grandpa. Zoidberg and the mice stood over a writhing Richard.

The smiling sliver of the moon was in her climax, but darkness hung over the group.

Tommorow was going to be a long day.


	7. W Pacanowie kozy kują'

Keep Moving forward

-Walt Disney

"Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunter"

- African Proverb

King Babar looks out at the ocean, amongst the wafts of seaweed strewn about the beach, garbage from Rio, New York, Hendaye, and other Atlantic cities. Coconut palms swayed in the distance, and the dusk sun was a pale orange, casting a reflection many miles long on the blue water.

_Calming_, he thought to himself, as he strolled along the beach. _But, I remember my kingdom being a good hundred yards from the ocean._

This was true. It took a couple minutes walk to get to the beach with his family, maybe 30 minutes at most.

His family died in the short period of chaos ensuing during the Chinese/Russian Epidemic, which became the Eurasian Super epidemic. His Wife, Celeste, and his three children were killed by a group of Congo militants called Dodds. Their leader was possessed by a serial killer, and they partook in all illegal activities in Subsaharan African; Blood Diamonds, Poaching, Black market Soccer Eugenics, War Rape, Genocide, and NBC trade/smuggling.

But, Africa wasn't spared from Flagg because of this. Flaggs-infested dust rained upon the Congo and West Africa, leaving the Congo and Sahara unspared.

* * *

If the sea level was a problem in Babar's Kingdom, Europe's saltwater invader was a disaster. Survivors on the British Isles and in Northern Continental Europe were drowning in salty brine. Benelux countries and Denmark were already submerged. The Black sea was invading from the East, The Mediterranean from the South, and The Atlantic from the North and West.

'W Pacanowie kozy kują', They shoe goats in Pacanow, they told him. Pacanow? Pacanow! How the hell would Matolek ever get to Pacanow? There's nobody! Nobody in Pacanow is able to shoe goats anymore.

Matolek bobs up and down in the tide. The wooden tub had proven itself in a North Sea tidal surge, but the Billy Goat had run out of cabbages only hours ago. Water was no problem for the Billy goat as it rained quite often. He knew, since he passed Big Ben yesterday, he was in England. The only problem was the sickly water that submerged the city which had burned during the pandemic. The search for the elusive landing spot was wearing the goat's patience thin. But, the smoke in the far off disance made Matolek wonder who survived here.

* * *

DiNozzo glances at the town surrounding him. He had entered coal country many miles ago, when he entered Pennsylvania. It was a quaint little one street town, with a general store to the left, a long row of houses to the right, and some low shacks up the road a bit. The air above him was choked with smoke, which was partially blotting out the sunlight. Every building in the town had been ransacked. Broken glass littered the ground where windows had been smashed. Doors were knocked clean off their hinges, and burnt out cars were in a state of disarray. Clovers, lichen, and moss had already colonized the asphalt roadway and sidewalk, and a meadow of flowers and tall weeds had sprung up between every building, or where ever lawn grass had been before. A rabbit darts across the street upon laying eyes upon DiNozzo.

In this late August weather, some water would be a wonderful thing to have. The water in this area is poisoned by heavy ash from Illinois Nuclear power stations and the coal ash drifting harmlessly on the wind. In lowlying areas, water levels have risen and flooded the areas with salt water. If he heads East, rising waters and an early nor'eastern will surely get him. Heading West would be disastrous for the opposite reason of droughts and tornadoes.

DiNozzo hastily followed the rabbit, thinking to himself, 'If I follow this rabbit to a source of water, I can then kill the rabbit." It bounded along a brick facade, white cottontail bouncing skyward with each kick of it's hind legs. DiNozzo slowly eased his way towards the nervous hare, careful not to scare it away. The rabbit sat itself down a few yards from DiNozzo, nose bristling with the man's scent, eyes, locked on DiNozzo's, anticipating his desire to kill him.

For what seemed like an interminable amount of time, DiNozzo and the Rabbit stood in a stalemate. Finally, as an eagle flies overhead, the rabbit shoots off from it's behind, and DiNozzo springs to life as quickly. The rabbit darts through a meadow into a stand of pines.

Several corpses littered the undergrowth, although DiNozzo could care less. Like a doe in a suburban backyard, he leaps clear of each corpse, tree or otherwise. His eyes were locked upon the lone hare, while still vigilant of his surroundings. He watched in a combination of bewilderment and frustration as the rabbit disappeared into a massive mining pit. He stopped just short of the drop off. While there was both a lake and a spiraling dirt path to the bottom, DiNozzo was intent on following the rabbit directly, instead of wasting time taking a different path.

He kicks the dirt in frustrations and spiys over the ledge "Fuck you, Rabbit, I'll find water somewhere else!" He almost thought of taking some shots at the rabbit, hand reaching into his holster, but decides not to waste them on something as useless as a petty grudge. He spits once again into the pit, and walks back into town.


	8. Intermission

**I have decided every so often, because of the assortment and variety of characters introduced so far, I'll put up a list of the characters introduced to that point.**

**And here they are!**

Mark Lilly - Ugly Americans

Jake Long & Lao shi Long - American Dragon

Zoidberg - Futurama

Three Mice - Mother Goose

Billy Hitchcock - Final Destination

Richard Krupse/Krupke - Westside Story

Draco Malfoy/ the Suited One/ The Harvester - Harry Potter

Greg Sanders - CSI

Tak - Desperation/The Regulators

Lammy - Happy Tree Friends

Duncan - Total Drama Island

Griffin - The Invisible Man

Jack Knife - Superjail

Anthony DiNozzo - NCIS

Simon Dianne - The Twisted Tales of Grimmsville

Mary Rinehart - The Twisted Tales of Grimmsville

Cubo Hassan - The Twisted Tales of Grimmsville

Russell - Happy Tree Friends

Italia Romano - Hetalia

Bowser - Mario Series

Tiang - Nat Geo Channel

Babar - The Story of Babar

Koziołek Matołek - 120 adventures of Koziołek Matołek


End file.
